Reinventing the Heartbeat
by Chris Anthony
Summary: Five years ago Edward Cullen changed the course of Bella Swan's life dramatically. She doesn't know but secretly he works to protect her from harm because of the pain he brought to her. If only Bella Swan knew that she was his world. AU,BxE


AN: This is my first Twilight Fic. I'm just going to give you guys a sample of what I have in store, because I just want to see if anyone likes it so far. If you like it please review and I'll continue otherwise I'll just leave it as a **one-shot**. If I continue this story it will be an _AU_. Jacob is in it, but he is a human, werewolves don't exist here, just vampires.

Reinventing the Heartbeat

**Edward's POV**

Chapter 1- 30 Seconds

I wanted to wrap her up in my arms and keep her there eternally. Even though I was cold and dead I liked to think that my love would give her some warmth. She was too beautiful and young to be living this way, from day to day, expecting to be let down in a new way. I rested my frigid hand against the glass window and took in the shape of her body. Small and delicate, fragile and beautiful as she slept. It was relatively early for her to be sleeping because she was always up, guzzling down energy drinks, and coffee while studying for tests. Bella Swan wanted to be the best.

I couldn't read her mind but I knew from observation that she wanted to get out of her own personal hell…_Forks_. When she was alone she often sat on her bed with her legs folded underneath her body while deep in thought. The mantra that escaped her lips was always the same, "The harder I work. The sooner I'll get out of here."

I wished with all my might that she would find her own personal heaven. After so much tragedy Bella Swan deserved some happiness in her life. I saw the light turn on in the hallway. With lightning speed I planted myself firmly against the side of the house, and waited for _his_ voice. It was my fault that Bella was living here with these people, and I would never forget that.

If I were still a human I would find it amusing that vampires could feel such complex emotions. Even though I was a _bloodsucker_ now Bella Swan had managed to find a place in my sedentary heart, and it almost felt like my heart beat around her. I swallowed as my hands started to shake. Victor Ambrosio was Bella's adopted father. He was stern, emotionless and often times downright cruel.

He was a military man that took in Bella after the death of her parents. He treated her the same as he treated his two sons, with indifference and enough frigidness to even make me shiver. I peered around the corner to watch as Victor switched on the light. Bella sat up; her chocolate hair surrounded her angelic face like a silky curtain.

" Isabella," He snapped.

She hated being called _Isabella_. On the first day of each year the teacher always called out her name, "Isabella Marie Swan," and then she would promptly correct them. "Bella," she would say in her small but strong voice. Her voice was like music to me.

From where I stood I could smell the stench of whiskey. Victor Ambrosio got laid off his job today. His thoughts were jumbled and confusing obviously an effect of all the alcohol he had consumed.

"Why the fuck isn't this house cleaned!" He insisted.

I used all of my will power to keep from busting into the house like a lunatic. Victor got so angry sometimes that he considered hitting her, but I always prevented him from doing so. When the urge came around and Victor raised his hand, I would dart inside and slam down a vase, or turn out the power. If Bella weren't in danger then it would be amusing because Victor was positive that _ghosts_ haunted the house.

"It was Noah's night to wash the dishes," she defended. Bella pulled back the covers anyways, "But I'll do it."

"Where is he?"

I knew that he had snuck out but Noah was smart enough to leave his car in the driveway and lock his door.

"I think he's sleeping," Bella answered. "Just go to sleep Victor I'll clean the kitchen."

I would clean the kitchen myself but I was only going to be Casper the _not_ so friendly ghost towards Victor, I had no desire to scare Bella, because I had already done enough to her in my lifetime.

It took her forty-five minutes to come back up to her room. I had remained at my post because Victor came outside to smoke a cigarette. I considered throwing acorns at his head for fun or maybe making noises like some suffering animal just to scare him sober. But I did nothing. I just waited for Bella.

When she came back she complained of needing to take a shower now. _Privacy_. The temptation to watch her undress was strong, but I respected her privacy. As she stripped off her clothes I allowed some of Bach and Mozart's compositions to run through my head like an Ipod stored entirely in my memory. As soon as she returned the music stopped and I watched her settle into her bed.

She was sad, but the world didn't see that. Only me.

My dead heart started to beat again.

xx**Edwardx**x

When she did sleep she tossed and turned. Bella gripped the sheets with white knuckles and her teeth grinded together in fear. "No, no," she would whisper into the night. Her rosy cheeks were stained with tears, and the fear etched on her face was so real. It was real because she had lived the nightmare over and over again for the last five years.

And so had I.

Downstairs Victor was taking plates and cups out of the cabinet and shattering them on the floor. _That crazy asshole_. At least Bella was too deep in sleep to be awakened by him. Unfortunately nightmare land was the best place to be right now, because she couldn't be physically hurt.

I crouched down on all fours and snarled at the sight of Jacob Black. He was another one I couldn't stand. I was insanely possessive of Bella, and I knew I had no right to be, but I was her protector even if she didn't know it. Within the last year Bella had died five times, but I had been in the background working tirelessly to save her life. I owed her that much for getting her here.

Jacob carefully peered inside the house and then he looked upwards at the spot where I had been. I was now in a tree watching darkly as Jacob crawled up the pillar to Bella's 2nd floor bedroom. If Victor knew that Jacob sometimes crawled into Bella's room then he would kill them both. I smiled at the thought of letting Victor have his way with Jacob for a while.

_Evil thought_. I quickly dismissed it.

As Jacob knocked on Bella's window a cold rain started to fall from the Heaven's above. I looked up and closed my eyes as the rain dripped down my pale skin. _I was starved_. Hopefully Alice would go hunting for us both. Because I wasn't going to leave as long as Jacob Black was alone with Bella.

I knew she was safe with him but I could read his mind also. Jacob was in love with her and that drove me insane. Bella came to the window.

"Jacob, what are you doing here?" she whispered.

"I couldn't sleep,"

"You couldn't sleep and you came _here_. He's at his worst tonight." She hissed.

"Which is why I came over. You could use a little protection living with that crazy man."

"I can protect myself, he's never laid a hand on me."

Jacob studied her.

"He always goes after them," she said in a small voice.

I felt guilty for not being able to protect Victor's sons, Noah and Jayden, especially Jayden because he was so young. Jacob was crawling inside now so the guilt disappeared. Once Bella closed the window I reclaimed my post and listened.

"So how are the college applications going?" Jacob asked with an easy going grin.

"So so, I've been swamped with so much work and Jake you can't stay for long."

"I worry about you Bella," He said in a low voice.

"Let me worry about myself," she snapped.

She thought she was so tough. I admired that about her.

Bella kept to her word and kicked Jacob out after thirty minutes. He asked her to call him if she needed him to come back. Even though I didn't like him I knew deep down that he was a good guy. _Just not the right guy for her_.

xx**Edward**xx

"So how did stalking…err I mean patrolling go?" Alice chirped.

She had been kind enough to wait for me before eating dinner. I wiped at my lips and rose slowly.

"You didn't finish your dinner," Alice said pointing down to the dead deer in front of me.

"I guess I'm not as hungry as I thought I was." I replied sullenly. I started to walk towards Alice's Yellow Bug. We would've run back home but the Forks police were out in droves trying to make their quota. Vampires were just legends in Forks, and Carlisle preferred to keep it that way, so Alice and I would abide by his rules. "I hate that her life is this way because of me."

"You can dwell on the negative or focus on the positive, her existence is better because of you." Alice was trying to be helpful. She practically floated beside me. "What happened wasn't your fault…"

I stared at her blankly.

"Fine, it was your fault but you were still a newborn then. You had no control."

I still liked to think that I had a choice.

"I have a plan." Alice said.

I returned a grunt in response.

"Bella needs some sunshine in her life," Alice smiled broadly, "A little Alice never hurt anybody."

"Alice don't interfere," I warmed.

"Carlisle doesn't have to know and besides he's a doctor. He deals with humans regularly and blood. I'm not dealing with blood, just a human, and Edward our school is full of them." Alice stared at me for a while longer waiting for my approval.

My jaw grew terse. I didn't see how Alice could help the situation. Bella only let a few people get close to her, and everyone else saw the face she put on for the world. "I'm tired," I said cracking a dark smile.

Alice swatted me on the shoulder, "Sounds like stalking her is making you more human."

"I just want to be part of her world." I remarked pathetically. Five years ago I could've been part of her world if I hadn't been turned into this. I balled my cold fist and rested it against the door handle. Alice was now driving at 100 mph. All of Forks passed me by right before I closed my eyes to pretend as if I could dream.

x**xEdwardx**x

When Alice and I returned home we found Carlisle and Esme watching TV. It was a hilarious sight because Alice had persuaded them to get a flat screen. Obviously the Cullen's had no use for television, because when they needed entertainment they just went outside to play _baseball_ in the cracking thunder.

"How was school?" Esme asked with a warm smile.

"Repetitive," Alice answered. She sunk into the chair beside Esme, "What are you guys watching?"

"CSI," Carlisle stated. He held a glass in his hand that looked like wine, but it obviously wasn't. Carlisle took a sip, "Esme thought that we would work on being _human_ while not around them." He turned to his beautiful wife and they shared a smile.

I didn't feel like pretending to be human today so I trudged upstairs.

"Edward are you okay?" Esme asked.

I nodded without turning around.

"Bella," Alice answered.

"Oh," Esme replied knowing that it was best to leave me alone for a little while.

**xxEdwardxx**

The rain pitter-pattered from the shingles and onto the glass. I watched transfixed. My arms were crossed in front of my chest. Even though it was raining I could see all the stars in the sky. They twinkled like a thousand diamonds. Just to occupy myself I picked out the constellations and said each name out loud. _Living this life was lonely_.

I heard someone knock on the door. I turned around and glanced over my shoulder. "You can just come in Carlisle, it's your house." I gave him a small smile and went over to my crisp white couch. It was covered with various photos I had taken.

These photos were my escape. When I was here thinking about how miserable I was as a vampire I would just flash back to the life I had before I became this monster that sustained itself on animal blood and unrequited love

I used to have a real family, and my heart used to beat. Blood filled my lungs, just my blood, and not animal blood. If Bella knew what I was, and what I did then I knew she would be repulsed. She would look at me like she did five years ago when it happened, when I took away her life.

I grabbed at my shirt clutching it in my fist. If it weren't for her then I would've ended the misery a long time ago. Carlisle took a seat beside me and gazed at me with warm honey colored eyes.

"Edward," He said calmly. He always spoke like this.

"I'm here,"

Carlisle squeezed my shoulder, "You can't continue to beat yourself up over Bella. She's stronger than you think."

_But I took everything away from her_.

"You can't change the past, but you can look towards the future. I know that this life is new for you, and it's going to be hard, but you can free yourself. Free yourself from the regret and the pain. We're not perfect obviously, but look at this as your chance to start over."

The door creaked open and Alice appeared. She was leaning against the doorframe waiting to offer her support if it was needed.

"You're not the same person that Bella met five years ago. You've grown, and you're doing a good job Edward. This isn't the life that you wanted, but this is your life. You're a Cullen, you're my son, and I can't just sit back and allow you to take on the weight of all of this. Give some of the pain to us."

Esme appeared behind Alice.

"You don't understand," I said through tight lips. It shouldn't be embarrassing to explain the extent of my love for Bella. Alice knew that I loved her because we always talked, but Carlisle and Esme were only left to entertain suspicions. "I'm in love with her,"

There was a moment of silence.

"I think they would be cute together," Alice chimed in.

I glanced at her and then down at the floor.

Carlisle sighed, "Edward, she's a human."

"I was at once too," I stated childishly.

"You were, we all were." Carlisle said softly, "But it's too dangerous. She's not a part of our world. If you really love her Edward then you'll let her go."

_Let her go_. His words echoed in my ear.

Later that night I went back to Bella's house. She wasn't in her bed. I frantically went from window to window searching for her. I was relieved to find her in bed with her six-year-old adopted brother.

I read his mind as the young boy slept.

_Keep me safe from the monster Bella. Please keep me safe. _

Her arms were wrapped around Jayden tightly and she was holding him close to her body.

I knew the monster he was referring to was not me, but instead his father. If only Charlie Swan knew how cruel his best friend had become since losing his wife to cancer, then he would be rolling around in his grave.

It was amazing how one incident could change someone's life so dramatically.

It took two years for Juliet Ambrosio to succumb to pancreatic cancer.

One year and three months for Victor Ambrosio to transform into a monster.

And it took exactly _thirty seconds_ for me to kill Charlie and Renee Swan. Thirty seconds that changed my life and Bella's life forever.

I looked into the window once more and I remained there until the sun ascended over the mountain peaks. I wanted nothing more than to be on the inside. I wanted to be Jacob, or even that annoying Mike Newton kid because at least they had contact with her.

I had no contact just regrets, and abominable wants that I shouldn't be having. But I had them. Every inch of my body desired to be touched by Bella Swan, just one touch was all I needed to feel alive again.

**xxEdwardxx**

So what did you think? crap or worth continuing lol.

Please review and let me know. Chris:)


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